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Tell your wife you love her, but before you do, take a moment and mean it.

If you are at all like me, you say 'I love you' to your wife about 100 times a day. But of those 100 times, how many of them are just words and how many of them follow a moment of reflection, so that the words are not just words said from habit?

I bring this up because 2010 has claimed yet another marriage in my circle of friends and family. The person spending the night in my guest room is the third person doing so in 2010, as a result of separating from their spouse.

I am not trying to tell anyone how to run their relationships and I am not claiming to be any great example myself. But if for no other reason than my personal sanity, if every other married couple in my life could just hold it together for at least the remaining few days of 2010, I would really appreciate it.
 

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Tell your wife you love her, but before you do, take a moment and mean it.

If you are at all like me, you say 'I love you' to your wife about 100 times a day. But of those 100 times, how many of them are just words and how many of them follow a moment of reflection, so that the words are not just words said from habit?

I bring this up because 2010 has claimed yet another marriage in my circle of friends and family. The person spending the night in my guest room is the third person doing so in 2010, as a result of separating from their spouse.

I am not trying to tell anyone how to run their relationships and I am not claiming to be any great example myself. But if for no other reason than my personal sanity, if every other married couple in my life could just hold it together for at least the remaining few days of 2010, I would really appreciate it.
:agree::bigthumbsup: good one BP.
 

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Roger that SR!! After my SO left, it amazed me all the other folks I talked to that they had the same happen to them. Getting to be way to easy to walk from relationships anymore. Nothing is sincere and meaningful, at least for a few .

I admit I was one of those that said i love you all day long, and really didn't take the time to mean it......Speaking for me, I kept caught up in what I had going on, and didn't really listen to well to what the other side had going on...........It would be great if a couple could have more common ground and things of importance that both felt the same on...........

Thanks for posting that, I needed to read it,,,,,,,,Have a great new year bud!!!!
 

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I agree, and for your sake I'm glad the year is almost over. There's nothing like trying to console someone that just dissolved a relationship.
 

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I agree, and for your sake I'm glad the year is almost over. There's nothing like trying to console someone that just dissolved a relationship.
LOL roger that !!!!!!!!!!!!
 

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I must say. I was close this year but I made it though it.

Besides. If I did tell her more than usual, she would think I was up to no good.:D
 

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I don't say "I love you" very often, maybe once every day or two, but I defiantly say "I'm sorry" more and I always mean it. I would recommend not saying "I'm sorry I love you" much ;)
 

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My Mrs

I tell my Mrs I love her several times every day, enough times infact that my mates often comment on how soft and mushy I am with her, one of them says "treat em mean to keep em keen", not something I hold with.

My wife is 21 years younger than me and keeps me on my toe's and for that and the faith she showed when she became my wife almost 7 years ago I mean it every single time I say I love you and I will go on saying it and meaning it whilst ever I can draw breath.

And I recon I will be saying it a lot tomorrow since it is her 29th birthday...

Regards to all,

Boffo...
 

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Every relationship suffers with time, complacency takes over and the comfortable expectations of daily life become forgotten. If like mine we started to grow apart through work and raising kids always going in separate directions. It took a near separation here too after 20 years together, to realize we married for a reason,we love each other. I believe if two people take the time to show intrest in each others lives, this brings them back together and actually opens the communication port, and the oportunity to spend quality time together. You are correct, tell her "I love you", like you really mean it, but also "show" her that you love her by telling her she's beautiful, by taking her hand and going for a walk, and best of all "Stick her on the back of your 9 and take her out for a ride".....Peace to all here and wish you and your S. O. a safe and prosperous New Year......:hot:
 

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This is a very good post, my marriage almost fell apart in 2010 also. I would say it was because of the constant deployments. I was gone 22 month in a 30 month stretch and we did not recognize each other anymore. However, we both have a strong faith foundation and that made us realize how sincere and committed we are to each other. I believe that it was the trifecta of God, my wife, and me that brought us back together. Oh by the way yesterday 28 Dec was my 13 year anniversary. Great post.
 

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I have been down the break up road and it is rough. It affects more than just you and your spouse. It suprised me how far the ripples on the pond went. I have married again and I must say that the air I breathe is almost as important to me as seeing her smile each day. Square Rounder is right, make sure you mean what you say and if you ever begin to say it without meaning it........take a few days and travel alone without her. You will be ready to mean what you say when you get home to her.

Love You Becky
 

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Marriage isn't for everyone. Some people should just never get married. If your selfish and overly needy do everyone a favor and stay single and please for the love of God don't have kids with someone like this.

For those that do choose to marry keep it simple, keep it fun, laugh, lighten up, be unselfish & giving and make sure you play together ALOT. If you have completely different interests and both are consumed by your own seperate careers, what kind of marriage do you really have? And whats the point?

I personally think if you say "I love you" 9,000,000 times a day to your wife it looses it's meaning and becomes something mundane and unimportant because your over using it. I'd rather say it once or twice and look her in the eyes and honestly mean it and even more importantly than saying it show her by your actions that what you say is what you mean.

What's funny about marriage is that if your with the "right" person it just works on it's own and it's very easy and simple and rewarding. If your with the "wrong" person honestly it's just a matter of time before it completely dissolves and it's nothing but work, frustration & disappointment in the meantime.

Divorce always carries a bad or negative connotation but sometimes it's a complete & warranted necessity to maintain your sanity. :doorag: But it's no fun to go through I can assure you of that.
 

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Cheaper to keep her ! Repeat after me YES DEAR , I am SORRY DEAR , JK

When you finally have that someone special in your life make them feel special , If Not someone else will :)
 

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I'm not an expert either but having been married for 33 years, I've gained a lot of experience. Listening, carefully, is a good skill to continue to sharpen too. About the only thing I got out of a corporate seminar one time was "seek first to understand before trying to be understood".

And if you'll allow me this weak analogy.. Being married is like riding your 9. When you're on the superslab or in some fun twisty's and everything is great, it's easy. When you get in a bit over your head and you start to think about bailing, you have to force yourself to make your mind say you will get through the danger. Same is true of marriage or any other serious relationship. When things get bumpy, you can't bail. You have to force yourself, or will yourself to get through it. You have to tell yourself that exiting the relationship is not an option.

This won't help everyone. Sometimes there's no alternative. But make exiting the relationship like taking a low end wipe out. The last refuge!

Just my $.02:doorag:
 
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